"The Defense Department ... says that
troops in Afghanistan have discovered several more tapes of Osama bin Laden
speaking with his followers. ... And if you order the whole set right now,
they'll throw in 'The Taliban's Wet 'n' Wild Spring Break'" —Conan
O'Brien
"Geraldo Rivera says Osama bin Laden is
hiding out in Pakistan ... which means the most hated man in Afghanistan is now
Geraldo Rivera." —Conan O'Brien
"It was reported today that Osama Bin
Laden has 50 brothers and sisters. Which absolutely shocked me because I had no
idea he was Catholic" —Conan O'Brien
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