Spider Jokes - Animal Jokes

What is a spiders favorite TV show?
The newly web game!

What did the wife spider say to her husband when he tried to explain why he was late?
Your spinning me a yarn here!

What do you get if you cross a tarantula with a rose?
I'm not sure, but I wouldn't try smelling it!

Why are spiders like tops?
They are always spinning!

What do you call a 100 spiders on a tyre?
A spinning wheel!

What has 8 legs and likes living in trees?
Four anti road protesters?
What did the spider say when he broke his new web?
Darn it!

What do you call a big irish spider?
Paddy long legs!

What is red and dangerous?
Strawberry and tarantula jelly!

Why did the spider buy a car?
So he could take it out for a spin!

What does a spider do when he gets angry?
He goes up the wall!

What would happen if tarantulas were as big as horses?
If one bit you, you could ride it to hospital!

Why are spiders good swimmers?
They have webbed feet!

How do you spot a modern spider?
He doesn't have a web he had a website!

What are spiders webs good for?
Spiders!

What kind of doctors are like spiders?
Spin doctors!